When Characters Collide a weird crossover
by books and cookies
Summary: This is what happens when a library is burned and books turn into ashes, piled togther. The main characters in here are Percy J., Harry P., Will T., Eragon S. and Edward C. Gregor and Lyra comes in later. Send reviews! And suggestions too!
1. Chapter 1

Hi people! This is my first story, kinda weird. But enjoy, though! Hee…O(∩_∩)O

Harry: WHERE IS MY GLASSES?

Percy: WHERE IS KRONOS?

Eragon: WHERE IS SAPHIRA?

Edward: WHERE IS MY MOUNTAIN LION?

Will: WHERE'S MY BOW?

Minnie Mouse: I have bow!!!!!!

Will: My bow isn't pink!

Everyone else: ……

Harry: Where are we? I can't see without my glasses!

Eragon: I like glasses filled with milk!

Percy: Milk?

Eragon: Come on, they're good!

Harry: Hello? Someone help me?

POOF! Harry's glasses appear, along with a woman with wings.

Fairy: I am your fairy godparent!

Harry: Thanks!

Edward: This is so weird…

Radom person poofs in: OMG!!!! Edward Cullen! Can I have your signature?

Edward: Who are you?

Random person: Your BIGGEST fan!

Edward: I'm famous?

Fan: A duh! You don't know? I read all four books in the Twilight Saga and watched the movie! You're, like, so, stinkin HOT!!!!!!!!!

Edward: Thanks?

Fan: I love you…

Everyone else: We're here, you know!

Fan: Oops! (Poofs away)

Edward：Uh, Twilight?

Percy: Ooh, yes, isn't famous in the US?

Edward: It's about ME?

Everyone: nod nod

Eragon bumps into Percy

Edward: Ouch

Percy: It is so dark…I'm scared!!!!!!!

Harry Potter: Lumos!

Light appears at tip of wand

Will: Whoa you're a sorcerer?

Harry: …I'm a wizard.

Will: Wizards exist?!!!

Harry: I know that I do and I'm a wizard.

Will: COOOOOOOL!!!!

Percy: ~giggle~ your British accent sounds so funny. (In British accent, mimicking Harry)"I know that I do".

Harry poked Percy with his wand

Harry: Abra Cadabra!!!!!!

Percy: GASP!! You set a curse on me?

Harry: Maybe, maybe not.

Percy: WAHHHHHHHH! The stupid wizard bullies people…

Will went to comfort Percy.

Harry: Sorry.

Percy: That's not good enough! Can you make ice cream out of thin air? I'll forgive you if you do!

Harry: I uh can't…

Percy: And you call yourself a wizard! Hmph!

Suddenly, a dark shadow appeared…


	2. Chapter 2

Thanks for all the reviews and suggestions, they were really helpful, really. Please send more! Here goes the second chapter…

As the dark figure immerged…

"Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" yelled Percy, bouncing everywhere and hitting several people.

"What's wrong with you?" asked Eragon

"Had Rick Riordan ever mentioned that I get hyper when I am nervous?" said Percy

"Eh? Who is Rick Riordan?" asked Eragon

"Uh…" Percy did not know…

The figure came out of the darkness, it was…

"Morgarath!" cried Will "I thought you were dead."

"I thought you were a cookie" said Harry

"I thought you were SpongeBob" said Percy

"I thought you were Cosmo" said Edward

Everyone looked at him.

"What? Ever watched Fairly Odd Parents? It's funny."

Harry's fairy godparent poofs here.

"Anyone called me?"

"No…we were saying----"

Edward never got to finish his sentence

"SILENCE!!!!!" Boomed Morgarath "I am Morgarath, Lord of the Rain and Night!"

And he waited…

Cricket cricket…

"Where did that cricket come from?"

"It's my lucky cricket!" Mulan poofs in

And then she poofed out…

"Enough!" yelled Morgarath "Where is Billy? I can't believe I hired such an ignorant, lazy person to do the special effects…"

Morgarath leaves and comes back pulling a man about twenty-eight by the ear.

"I can't believe you were dozing off again! I said the cue and you still didn't work the thunder and lightning!! And where is the flashlight? I can't believe I paid money to hire such a…"

Disclaimer: The next part is deleted because it took up too much space with Morgarath's yelling.

Beep beep beep…

"Now" said Morgarath triumphly "I am Morgarath (Thunder), Lord of the Rain and Night!"

"I can't control myself, got me calling out for help! SOS please, someone help me, it's not healthy, for me to feel this way" Percy sang

"Please be quiet." Said Edward

"I never liked that song" said Will

"Me neither." Said Eragon

"SOS?" asked Edward.

"Yup." said Will and Eragon.

"Isn't it by the Jonas Brothers?"

"No it's another song"

"Oh"

Jonas Brothers poof in.

"Anyone called us?"

"NO!"

"Alright, geez."

And they poof out.

"Hello? I'm here you know!" noted Morgarath

"You are nothing compared to me!" said Voldemort

"Nor me!" said Kronos

"Me either" said Gabotorix

"What about us?" asked the Venturi.

"Uh oh." Said everyone.

"Come on girls, we have a whole lot of boys to chase here!"

And a bunch of girls dressed in pink and smiling slyly poofs in.


	3. Chapter 3

I'm adding two new characters in this chapter. Boy, this crossover is just getting bigger…

I am in extreme need of suggestions, I feel like the chapters are getting shorter, and I'm running out of ideas. Thanks.

Well, enjoy!

The villains stared at those girls.

"Ooh, these men and boys are SO sexy!" said one girl

And the chase began.

All the villains ran first, followed by the boys.

"Harry, wait! I wanna tell you that your eyes are beautiful and I suggest you take off those glasses and get contacts!"

"OMG, Edward you are the sexiest vampire in the whole wide world, I love you!"

"Ooh, Percy, you're sooo cute!"

"Hey, Eragon, can you take me on Saphira to a beautiful castle and live happily ever after?"

"Wiii-iil! Wait! I wanna see you practice that cool bow!"

The fangirl club chases all of the boys and villains.

Suddenly, the villains fell down a hole.

"Where'd they goooooooooooooooooooooooooooo?!" while Percy said the last word, he fell down too, followed by Harry, Eragon, Edward, and Will.

When they opened their eyes, they found themselves in a place that had grass that are puffy as if made out of play-dough, flowers too bright to be real, and a watery blue sky. Each villain was riding on a cow, their faces stretched into a creepily sweet smile.

"Welcome to HAPPY HAPPY LAND, where everyone, everything is-a happy lappy!" said the all villains and cows.

Percy fainted.

Eragon screamed.

Will felt his heart skipped a beat.

Harry had goose bumps on his skin.

Edward cried for his mommy.

Then the villain somehow got dressed in maid clothes and stared dancing the happy dance with the cows.

They made a circle around the boys.

Then someone fell from the sky, crashing on the ground and the ground shook, so that the happy lappy villains flew into the sky with their happy lappy cows.

It was a boy around twelve. He looked creepily like Percy but not exactly.

"OW. Oh, man. Is this Underland? It looks too bright. Where's Ares?" said the boy (it was before the last book, when Ares was alive)

Percy woke up all of a sudden.

"Why do you want to see the god of war?" asked Percy "And why do you look sooo much like me?"

"I dunno why I look like you but I wasn't talking about the god of war, I was talking about my bat, Seaweed Brain." Said the boy

"How do you know my nickname?"

"I don't know"

"But…"

"Seriously, where IS Ares, my bond? He is a huge bat."

Lyra poofs in.

"Oh, so your daemon is a bat?"

"What on earth is a daemon?"

"It is a human's soul that is out of the human's body, taking the form of an animal, or many animals when the human is young."

"EH?"

"It's your soul and pet!"

"Ohhhh. I still don't get it."

"Whatever, I guess the bat isn't your daemon, your daemon is inside your body, like Will."

Will Treaty's head pops up.

"What's that about me?"

"We weren't, well, I weren't talking about you!"

"But you called me."

"No I didn't, I mentioned Will."

"I am Will!"

"No you're not!"

"Yes I am! I'm Will Treaty."

"I was talking about Will Parry!"

"How was I supposed to know?"

"You're the one whop interrupted!"

And so they got into a fight…

Announcer: And the ultimate match begins!

Audience: Whooo! Clap clap!

"Rock, paper, scissors!" they said together.

Unfortunately, Percy was Will's coach and taught him the Great Finger Gun.

Lyra and Pan ripped up the whole stage.

As they tried to shred the last corner, someone stopped them.

Everyone gasped, it was--------

Hee, I'm evil, I love cliffhangers. Remember to send suggestions! I truly need them!


	4. Chapter 4

Sorry I couldn't update sooner, my dad put a password on the computer and I couldn't get on.

Well, here goes:

"BARNEY!!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOO…"exclaimed everyone

Behind Barney, there was a four other shapes. As they immerged from the shadows, the boys (and one girl now) could see purple, green, yellow, and red.

"And the teletubbies!!!!!! Yikes! We're dead!"

But that's not it, there were two other evil beings behind them, it was…

"Frosty the snowman riding on Charlie the unicorn! They teamed up! Oh, no…"everybody groaned.

"For justice!" cried Barney, the Teletubbies, Frosty, and Charlie. (I'll call them the BTFC from now on, OK?)

But before they could attack, the boys and one girl killed them. Harry used the killing curse on Barney. Percy killed Teletubby one with Riptide. Gregor killed Teletubby two with his unnamed sword. Edward killed Teletubby three by sucking up the blood but when he found out Teletubbies had no blood, he shredded the Teletubby up like he did with Esme's pillows. Lyra told Pan to kill the last Teletubby. Will shot an arrow through Charlie and Eragon use Brisingr to burn Frosty. The battle ended. They won.

"Let's have a tea party with stuffed animals!" suggested Edward in his extremely girly voice

So, they had a tea party. Lyra didn't join because she thought it was "too herbish and uncool cause, like, herbs are SO last season and tea is herbish"

But then, the BTFC rose from the dead! They turned into zombies, and hopped toward the Boys and one Girl.

"Hoppy hoppy hoppy" they chanted while hopping

The Boys and one Girl ran

The BTFC can't catch up by hopping

Barney had an idea

DING! The light bulb lit up.

"Hey Barney, you didn't pay me to do the Special effects, Morgarath did! You owe me ten buck for the light bulb and sound, yo." complained Billy

"Mmm, is that cookies?" asked Percy dreamily

Barney brought all the Boys and one Girl's beloved ones: Ginny, Annabeth, Alyss, Arya, Luxa, Will Parry, and…

"Oh, my beloved sweetheart wifely wife Bellally Bella!" cried Edward

"Ew, stop engrossing us!" said everyone else. To shut Edward up, they sat up his face, all of them.

PHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHT

"Did someone fart?" asked Eragon

Percy blushed

"Hey he was sitting on Edward's mouth when he farted" noted Will T.

"His face is too hard and lumpy, let's get up and gag him instead" suggested Gregor

"All right!" said Harry

Lyra gagged Edward up.

"I'll finish off the BTFC!" Harry volunteered

"Wingardium leviosa! (At least that's what I thought it's spelled)"

The BTFC flew up in the sky, like a shooting star

"Make a wish!" yelled Percy

"I wish I can drink Bella's blood some more, it's heaven…ahh…"

"I wish I can eat a dementor, I always wanted to"

"I wish Ares was a pretty bat"

"I wish I can cut cucumbers with the subtle knife, oh the crunchy sound!"

"I wish I can meet a mermaid in the sea since I can breathe in it. Ouch!" (Annabeth slapped Percy)

"I wish Saphira would marry another dragon and I get to be the bridesmaid"

"I wish I can shoot into space and hit a Martian, it'll be SO cool!"

Eragon blew up the BTFC and they exploded into fireworks

"Such a beautiful sight…" Percy sniffed and leaned on Gregor's shoulder

"Ew, dude, get off me, man! This is SO not groovy, yo!"

Percy jumped up and stared sing hallelujah while doing the chicken dance

"Did you turn mental, Seaweed Brain?" snapped Annabeth

"He is not mental, he has gotten Mentaltitis!" Boomed a voice

That's the end of this chapter! Send some more specific suggestions please! Thanks! 


	5. Chapter 5

So sorry for disappearing for a whole month, nearly. School started I am SUFFOCATING in homework... But now I am back and READY! WHOOOO!

Don't look at me like that, you already know I'm crazy, right?

Now on with the story.

Percy blinked. Stupidly.

"Who said that?"

"Yo, peeps! Christa in da his house! A WHOOP WHHOP! My voice magnifier is OFF DA HIZZA, dawg!" yelled a man, dressed in weird old goofy clothes.

"Who are you?" asked Edward

"Don't talk! Your breath stinks from Percy's fart!" said Lyra, gagging Edward, again.

"Really, who are you?" Will (Treaty) looked puzzled

"You people are SO unobservative. He said his name was Chista, right?" said Harry potter, using his smarts, literally. You know, there's an underwear brand called "smarts". It has answers on it. Teachers never find out. Cause the answer's INSIDE. Awesome, right?

"Duuude, it's so groovyly short for Christopher, yo! Y'all gon' have to be like Harry and use smarts, ain't cha?! "

"Christopher who?" asked Eragon

"Christopher Columbus!" said Harry, using his smarts again.

"That guy that invented whoopee cushions?" asked Percy, obviously lacking "Smarts"

"No, the guy that sold a toilet to an ant!" said Lyra

"Ants use toilets? I never knew." said Will

"There are lots of things you don't know." Said Harry smartly, who has "Smarts"

"THAT'S THE GUY WHO FOUNDED AMERICA, PEOPLE!" cried Eragon, who can't hold it in any longer

"Whoa, even the lizard dude knows!" said Percy

"The lizard dude? It's dragon, Seaweed Brain!" accused Eragon, who looked offended.

"Same thing."

Eragon was so mad his face got red.

"Mmmmmmmm" Edward was still gaged

"Shut up!" ordered Lyra

"Hey, Christopher Columbus speaks slang?" exclaimed Will

"Like I said, there are lots of things you don't know." Boasted Harry

And then, Christopher Columbus poofed out, dragged by his fat mommy and yelling "Yo, mamma! I was having my grooving fun!"

And then James Bond(young)poofed in.

Alex Rider poofed in after him.

"MY IDOL!!!!!!!!!!" yelled Alex hugging James and practically missing him.

"Dude, you're ruining my cool. Get offa me, man!" said James Bond, coolly

"Can I have your autograph?" pleaded Alex with huge, giant, enormous puppy eyes.

James Bond(young) drew his gun. Everyone but Alex screamed.

And that ends this chapter.

Sorry it was so short, my parents are urging me to go to sleep.

Review! You know you want to…


	6. Chapter 6

Thanks for the comments!

And for A.R. fans, I'm putting him in for good!

Let's do the happy dance!

Nah, just jump to the story.

Alex did this move so fast barely anyone saw him. Before the Boys and One Girl knew it, the gun was dropped, and James Bond was on the ground singing a chorus of "ow"s.

"You're so cool! EEP!" Lyra stared at Alex, mouth open and ignored Will(Parry)'s glare

Alex smiled his signature smile like a movie star and nodded at the camera, showing off his white teeth "I'm a spy, I know things." And then a bunch of girl went "Ohh…"and fainted

Actually, they fainted because they liked Alex so Lyra and Pan used a big chopstick(trust me, it's pretty big)to knock them out.

Will (Treaty) saw Edward holding a picture he drew and jumping up and down as if something's anxious, going "MMMMMMMM!" (Remember, he was gaged?)

He took the picture from Edward.

And frowned.

"What's this?"

"It's Britany Spears with a toilet scooper!" said Eragon

"No, isn't that George Washington making out with a holy macaroni?" asked Gregor

"You're still here?" Lyra exclaimed

"Duuuuuuddet, I'm totally more o' the silent type." he answered

"Wait, that's OBVIOUSLY my dad on Saturdays!" said Percy

Will(Treaty)blinked. "Hun?"

Percy rolled his eyes

"Poseidon takes pictures of himself in the shower on every Saturday, like, duh!" said Percy a matter of factly.

Gregor's mouth dropped open.

"OMG, that's gonna be the topic of gossip for the next millennium!" shrieked Lyra happily, recording down every word Percy said

"Oh, man! Not again…I promised not to tell. I pinky swore…" just then percy drowned in his own saliva and fainted.

"I , Sir Lyra Knightsomethingwhateveritis, shall save thee, o' fair maiden" cried Lyra

"Not again…" Will(Parry)groaned and dove in after her

"Mmmmm!" Edward was still gagged

"Shut up." said Will(Treaty)

"You people are soooooooo foolish, too mentally retarded to be in my, Harry Potter the great's presence!" said Harry, who has been quiet so far "He obviously drew a monkey with a nuclear bomb, DUH!"

Edward nodded eagerly.

Will(Treaty)looked confused.

Edward tilted his head up

And there, they saw, the Evil Monkey with a huge nuclear bomb.

The Evil Monkey laughed his maniac laugh.

Edward broke the ropes around him and took out the gag, which he remembered that he could have done that all along since he had super-strength. Then he cried for mommy and sucked his thumb, rocking back and forth and back and forth and back and forth and back and-

Will you STOP?-yelled a reader

Oops, sorry.

"It's Nucly's cousin!" said Alex, back to his normal mode

"Nucly?" Asked Gregor

"YUP! I named the last nuclear I dealt with Nucly!"said Alex happily

"You named a nuclear bomb that could have killed thousand of people "Nucly"?" Harry's tone was flat "COOOOOOOL!"

"I know, right?"

They did the happy dance together happily.

"There's a bomb up there, people!" yelled Eragon.

They looked up again.

"Countdown: 30, 29, 28…" said the computer voice

The monkey laughed again and flew away with his flying wedding cake(don't ask me where he got that, you don't want to know…)

Everyone who was conscious and not away and not crying (which was only a few people) panicked. Except Alex.

"Here's what we should do, quick…" Everyone huddled beside Alex, listening.

And we're done, folks!

At least done with chapter 6.

Sorry I made them OOC, I had to put some humor in my story.

Now REVIEW!!!!!!!!!!


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